Chris Brown. Drake. John Mayer. Jason Mraz. Keri Hilson. Aaliyah. PCD. Goo Goo Dolls. James Morrison. Colbie Caillet. Michael Jackson. Mario. Jack Johnson. Alicia Keys. John Legend. Marie Digby, Boyce Avenue (covers). Life House. Danity Kane. Kanye West. Leona Lewis. Lil Wayne. Maroon 5. One Republic. Usher. Passion. Pharrel. Tamia. Rihanna. J. Holiday. Janet Jackson. Bobby Valentino. Anything and Everything.

Have you ever looked at a picture of yourself and see a stranger in the background? I have; several times, in fact, and it just made me wonder how many strangers have pictures of me; how many moments of other people's lives have i been in? Was i a part of someone's life when their dreams came true? or was i there when their dreams died? Did i keep trying to get in as if we were somehow destined to be there? or did the shot take us by surprise?
Just think, you could be a big part of somebody's life and not even know it.

When I was small, i thought that life would be a breeze, and that nothing could happen to me; kind of like i was invincible. As many times i would get band-aids, bruises and scars, or stitches, it felt like nothing to me. As if shedding a few tears were magical, because i would be fine the next day. I would dream all of the time of who i would want to be when i grow up, like i could just pick and choose, and miraculously be one of those successful doctors or lawyers or designers or actresses or police or whatever other occupations i dreamed of having. But as i grew up, I felt like all of my dreams started to slip away. I realize that reality is where i stand, and not those fantasies i have, talking to stuffed animals and playing dress up. I have this whole life ahead of me filled with big plans; plans to find my perfect match, the one who will complete me, the perfect job, or at least one that will support the lifestyle i would love to live in, and much more. The more and more i thought about reality instead of my dreams, i realized that, this isnt going to be an easy journey at all. Because it's not until the end of your life that you realize how the dreams you made were simply dreams. At the end, when you're looking back instead of forward, you want to believe that you made the most of what life gave you. You want to believe that you're leaving something good behind. You want is all to have mattered.

It got me to thinking if i should live life for what it is right in front of me, or should i map out my life so i could follow it day after day? And have anything that ive done for the past 16 years mattered? Am I leaving anything meaningful behind? Did i change someone's life?

2009, to me is a fresh start. The first breath after a day of pouring rain. The first bite into an apple.

I'm trying something new. Something called "the fine line where selfless meets selfish"
I know, it sounds absurd in so many ways, but it makes sense to me.
I am pretty sure God forgot to give me strength, or the ability to say no. Or maybe He gave me someone's extra "compassion". I honestly dont have a huge problem with this, but sometimes, it takes a toll on me. Sometimes this means that I stay up till five AM finishing someone else's homework for them because they simply told me that they were "tired", or choreographing 3 more dances than i need to because someone had "something else" that they had to do. I honestly dont mind helping others out; in fact i live off of that, but sometimes, i need to take care of myself before i help others. My life isnt perfect. at ALL. I have things going on in my life right NOW that probably only 4 people in my entire life know. and probably 2 that know the entirety of it.

Everytime i do something selfless, just for a second, i wish that it is done from others as well. Whether it be back at me, or to another person; i just want to know that I'm not alone. People laugh at how much of a humanitarian i seem to be, sometimes even mad because i put myself in danger giving money to some homeless guy in the sidewalk, or because i support a cause they dont. Ive gotten to a level where I have no faith in people's hearts or the world's compassion as a whole. Does that mean everybody in the world has a black heart or is completely heartless? Of course not. But if you think about it, most of the world is on the side of selfish rather than selfless. I dont criticize, nor do i blame any one of you. Its man-kind in general. Sometimes i kinda want to have so much faith in a God just so i could blame Him for this madness and not get struck down to hell for it. Maybe I'll just blame those monkey's we evolved from.

I just want to see people CARE for a change. See people walk by a dysfunctional person and say hi. See someone carrying a crapload of books, help them. Hear announcements or see a charity showcase somewhere, donate. Stop thinking about what you want to buy from H&M or Forever 21, or how badly you want that new Gucci. First of all, unless you make your own money, stop wasting your parents' money. and Secondly, think of this economic crisis. I suggest you guys save all of the money you guys have in your grasp. And Thirdly, think about who's lives you could change. One Dollar to a donation or a blood donation can change many lives. Even just putting a smile on your face in a rainy day can help brighten many people's days.

Reach out and make a change.
Peace.
Love.
Believe.
Harmony.
Change.
Stand Up.
One Love.
One Heart.
Brotherhood.
Sisterhood.
Lets get together and feel alright.

kathleen is the name. im a dancer. june 9th is the most important day of our lives. (: i am a JUNIOR at walnut high. i have no idea what i want to be anymore. music is my life..its the only thing that keeps me sane when im out of it. i like to cook. I'm addicted to watching food network. I absolutely love comedians like dave chappelle, kevin hart, and russel peters. Italian is my forte. If i like you enough, ill cook for you. drama-free is the way to be. ill stand my ground when i believe that i should. Your opinion about me does not matter to me. When I completely support something, dont you dare try to oppose me. You will get ur ass beaten in debate. I am a great listener to problems. Fortunately for you guys, I am a person that you can trust, UNfortunately, i trust many people too easily. I dont like being a doormat, but im stuck in that rut. i try to believe that i control my own happiness, but thats never going to happen. im one of the nicest people out there, or so ive been told which sometimes is at my own disadvantage. i dont hold grudges, but i will fight back. I'm allergic to rudeness. I love songs, dances, words, situations, or even people that give me chills or make me cry tears of joy. talk to me on aim, facebook or myspace. dance with me. :] &truthfully, i'm not that great.

September 2008
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